Things I Won't Eat

Picky eaters really bother me. I looooove food and it kind of breaks my heart when people are unwilling to try new things. My 14 year-old brother-in-law Danny is the pickiest eater I have ever met, and I give him THE hardest time about it. Eating dinner at the same table as him used to drive me crazy. I'm sure he'll grow out of it eventually, but he's missing out on some awesome food in the meantime. Sorry, Danny, but you need to expand your food horizons! Life is too short to hate spaghetti, little bro.

I used to be pretty picky. There was a space of a few years where I wouldn't eat any meat product made out of pigs. I've gotten back into pork products in the last year, and I love bacon and ham, and sausage is pretty good IN things, but I still don't love pork chops. Besides that though, I've rarely met a food that I don't like. That's not to say I will eat anything and everything, but I'm pretty close. There are a few foods, though, that I WILL NOT touch. Ever again.


First and foremost, you've got peanut butter. Why does ANYBODY like that? It's sickly sweet and has a terrible texture. The smell alone makes me feel like throwing up a little. I'm so terrible to Nathan when he eats peanut butter, I won't even kiss the poor guy until the smell dissipates a little bit. Ugh, I'm sure I'm fairly un-American for hating peanut butter, but I think Nutella is a more than appropriate substitute. The funny part is, I really like PEANUTS. But I hate peanut butter. I also like almond butter. It doesn't make sense to me, but peanut butter is so gross, I can't even talk about it any more.

The second food I hate is called "hominy." I have NOOOOOO idea why it's called that, because I loathe it to the point where I won't even look it up on Wikipedia. ~Apparently~ it's good as grits, but I wouldn't know, because the only way I've had it is heated up in a saucepan with butter added. Barf. The texture might be the worst thing on the planet. I would rather eat clay. As I no longer live with my parents (and hopefully will never live with them again), I am happy to say that I don't think I'll ever have to eat that crap again. My eventual children are never going to have to suffer through one second of these horrible mistakes of botanic evolution.

SWEET PICKLES. YECH. I love dill pickles so, so much. They're so delightful and pleasing to my palate, but their awful cousins, the dreaded sweet pickles, make me want to scrape my tongue with sand paper. They're GROSS. They're really really gross. The key to their disgustingness is found in the word "sweet." I like sweet stuff. Rice Krispies Treats are basically all sugar, and I love them. But sweet pickles are ridiculously sweet in the worst possible way. I haven't eaten a sweet pickle or sweet pickle relish in years, but like with peanut butter, the smell makes me nauseous.

Last, but not least...

Pineapple. Oh, where do I even begin with pineapple? I usually like foods that are delightfully yellow. It's a good color for food, but pineapple, not so much. It's not a matter of taste with pineapple as much as the fact that if I were going to eat an entire can of pineapple, I would be throwing up for the next two days. Ladies and gentleman, I am allergic to pineapple. I first found out when I was at camp. Lunch was Hawaiian haystacks with Dole pineapple orange banana juice. I went into anaphylactic shock. I started wheezing, broke out in hives, and had the WORST stomach-ache of my life. It turned out I was really allergic to pineapple and had ingested a TON of it. I didn't know about my allergy before that week, because we rarely had pineapple at home. That was not my best day. My allergy isn't as severe as it used to be, but eating pineapple without taking appropriate measures beforehand still ends in vomiting. Nowadays I do my best to avoid pineapple, but I pop a Benadryl and a couple Tums and deal with it when my aunt's mother makes this awesome peach salad she does for family gatherings. It's worth it for that, and only that. In all other instances, pineapple can just stay the heck away from me.

All other foods are more or less fair game. Before I went to Germany I ate some pretty awful cheese known as Tilsiter (my fellow German students dubbed it "Death Cheese") and wanted to die. But when I was there, I ate it AGAIN and really liked it. My teacher, Elke, was pretty happy, since nobody else was willing to try it for a second time. I really like food. I like it more than I like trashy reality television, which, for those of you who don't know me that well, is A LOT.

Post the foods you hate in the comments (and your thoughts on the foods I hate)!